Saturday, December 1, 2012

More madness from the past!

Anyone curious about the origin of this blog's name?

8 years ago, on a game development forum, a friend (dwave1165) and I used to get a 'little' crazy.  He pretended to be Canadian, and to have a special interest in bacon, fungus and mold.  I may have exaggerated and embellished those lies a bit.  Here are some examples:

Ah, from a distance, it is just a spray of black flecks against the base of the wall. Against a background of peeling paint and rotting woodwork, the spores are the very living essense of life! Life from death and decay! Supply a bit of darkness and moisture and lo, like an out of control mutation a black stain grows together obscuring the long neglected surface beneath...
Ah, sweet mystery of life..."


Or 'Paradise' as described by our own expert on the subject, dwave1165!
Just a couple of questions to start for your fans, dwave...
One: How is your book, 'Rot and Rebirth, a Celebration of All-Things-Fungi!' coming along?
Two: What can you tell us about how you discovered your life's passion and how it can change all of our lives?


__Sweet Passion!

Not all mysteries can be shared. Even amongst the tightest of friends! If all could just know the deep pondering that moulds can cause. Imagine world peace brought on by the study of pulsating pustules.


Dave, in Chapter Two of your book, 'Rot and Rebirth', you mention spores, the reproductive method whereas fungi proliferate. Can you elaborate on what happens when these spores find a nice, dark, wet spot?
Also, I have a question from one of our readers, "What should I do if I find mildew growing in my bathroom? It's soooo nasty, little black spots all over the ceiling. Help? Love your column, Rhonda"
Well, this question presents a number of problems dear readers. If even one of you is interested in the answer, I will provide it here.
. Let's see, where did we leave off...? Ah, yes, the Elk Stones. Dave, I have heard from a notable source() that there are many varieties of Elk Stones, and that secretly she has long admired your work in this and the related fields of Cryptogamous' Plants. For those of you unfamiliar with soft spongy growths that are destitute of chlorophyll I just can't convey how much you are missing. Then there is the notoriety the Elk Stone story is bringing as it weaves the passion of deriving norishment wholly or chiefly from organic compounds...It all leaves me a bit breathless! Wow, I think we better cut to a message from one of our sponsors...
I simply must ask another trivia question. The response to the last one was encouraging.
What produces 75 % of the world's oxygen? Plants? Trees? Lead? Vary small rocks?

All wrong.

Photosynthetic algae and cyanobacteria do
algae and bacteria are single cell organisms---neither plant nor animal.
It's like noticing the quiet girl you always took for granted. One day you notice that she has beautiful eyes and that when she looks at you those same eyes light up and dance with mischief...One day someone will ask you what a lichen is, and next thing you know you find yourself answering: "Unicellular algae that has joined with fungi..."
Simple words fail to convey the miracle of life...Perhaps Dave can explain better than I. He has an upcoming book entitled 'The Lord won't mind?' Dave? I can't begin to imagine how that relates to fungus...
Three, two, one and we're back!

Steve: "And here we are in Dave's garden, and this is a continuation of our ever-popular 'Conversations with Dave' series. Although, Dave does appear to be very intent upon something at the moment. Let's see if our cameraman Timothy can get a close-up of the action."

Timothy: "What, you want me to say something or just tape?"

Steve: "Feel free Tim. I'll just stand here and enjoy this delightful Sangria with my Costa Rican Moderno Number Five cigar!"

Timothy: "Well, ok. As you can see folks, Dave is on all fours and it isn't his best side, but never mind that. He appears to be examining something."

Steve: "Say, what's that on the radio, Bowie? Somebody turn it up."

Timothy: "Oh my God, what is that? Shouldn't you at least wear some gloves...?"

Dave: "Ah, a perfect specimin of the Armillaria Ostoyae...the Honey Mushroom!"

Timothy: "Did you just dig that up with your bare hands? I'd swear that it was growing out of some sort of fecal matter..."


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